Child Reunification: Easier said than Done

Lisa James

Child Reunification: Easier said than Done

 

After 20 years of running in and out of jail, I had reached my destination.  Prison.

That was when my journey began, but it was filled with unexpected emotions, rejection, and years of battling with my inner-self. I could barely breathe when my daughter told me she didn’t need me in her life; when my son declared I wasn’t his mother; and when my baby girl said, “If you put your hands on me, I am going to call the police on you Lisa.”

Family reunification wasn’t a mere word for me. After 14 years of sobriety it remains a process that never ends. I spent 8 months behind bars for good-time while serving a 16-month sentence. While there, all I could think about was my children and how badly I wanted to see them. Ironically, the only thing that got me through it was convincing myself that my desperation didn’t matter because while I ran the streets until my feet would bleed they weren’t my concern.

So why now?

It was painful, but my reality. So I proceeded to get acquainted with my environment.

As it was when I was free, so it was while incarcerated. I received hate mail from every side. I had burned all my bridges. But if I was to survive, I knew I needed to focus on how to make that happen.

So I found my strength in prayer and the support of women serving life sentences in prison. Once released and connected to my children I took lash after lash from every one of them. It nearly crippled me, but helped me realize that my fight wasn’t for them. It was my battle to wage and win.

The big question: how was I going to do it? I found my answer because life was truly in session one-day-at-a-time.

So I found my strength in prayer and the support of women serving life sentences in prison. Once released and connected to my children I took lash after lash from every one of them. It nearly crippled me, but helped me realize that my fight wasn’t for them. It was my battle to wage and win.

3 Comments
  • Lisa James
    Posted at 05:24h, 06 July Reply

    This is my story, feel free to comment openly.

  • Veronica Harris baker
    Posted at 12:32h, 12 July Reply

    Thank God he was there and you listen to him with him on your side we can do all things prayers changes things we just have to have the faith

    • Lisa James
      Posted at 00:12h, 13 July Reply

      Veronica, it is a mother’s nightmare to live her life separated from her children in spirit. To know that you are loved and safe, that you have someone fighting for you is enough to make you feel like you are on top of the world. I wish I could help them understand how much I get it. I too, missed that but a fresh start and new ways to begin again is powerful and so rewarding. In the meantime until we safe enough to travel down that journey together, I must continue this journey because my life depends on it. Thank you for your words of encouragement.

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